i'm so freaking pissed!

THEY wont let me go to KL..!!! now, giving the excuse that i'm asking them last minute?? two weeks b4 hand is last minute?? what the??!! as if THEY would remember anything if i tell THEM about all my plans a months b4?? sheesh!! and now what??! i'm not suppose to talk about all these 'plans' now but after spm... "you tell me which is more important, you plans or your spm..??!!" okay fine, but then if i wanna go out right after or just a day after spm, wouldn't that be lagi last minute?? and i'm not suppose to go since it's last minute??!! it isn't logical.. what THEY are trying to do is lock my up in the house?? keep me away from the society?? grow me up into becoming a loner?? THEY say i'm not street-wise enough... yes THEY are right, if THEY never let me out into the society, of course i shall NEVER learn to be street-wise!!! doesn't it make sense??!! THEY say that i can't expect THEM to be like my friend's parents and that THEY have the right to not follow our (my friends and i) plans..." why don't you and your friends follow my plans??!!" so fine, since HE has that rights, doesn't that makes me have that rights too?? i don't have to follow his plans as well..! i'm also human, i've got my own rights..!!
and now, i'm not sure if i can even go for the hawaiian nite... since i can't talk about my plans now, but after spm, doesn't it makes it last minute??!! and therefore i can't go?? isn't that so cool?? trying to get a way just to force me not being able to go out?? why, shouldn't i thank THEM next time, for moulding me into an anti-social loner of the society like HIS stupid sister??!
i'm was grown up feeling lost in the family, when i was young, my granmother didn't really like me cos i'm a girl?? she's usually cooks my brother's favourite food and not mine when i did pester her a lot of times..?? i was sent to a baby-sitter when i was young for 3 years.. i only stay at home during sundays and sleep at night.. after 3 years being at the baby sitter's for most of the time, i was sent to a full-time nursery, having to eat my breakfast, lunch and tea there, having afternoon naps, bathing and watching tv there... only being able to go home after 5 in the evening.. after nursery, was going to kindy, though kindy was half-day, i was sent to peng hwa in the afternoon by my friend's grandmother... and only being able to go home at about 6 o'clock... my brother never liked me too when i was small, he said to my mother and in front of me, that he rather be the only child..and my mum didn't even scold him for saying that.. through the years of not being at home most of the time, i never did learn to communicate with my parents.. i never told them what i really want and like... till now, my conversation with them can only be at most be from 2 words to 2 or 3 sentences from me.. i would rather not go somewhere than to waste my time talking to them unless it's very important.
thankfully my bro doesn't hate me now, since i was in secondary.. but he sometimes does this particular thing that i dun like.. cos i dun like the one of his so-called 'friend' and when i'm pissed at him, i'll ignore him... i know i'm behaving like a freak but i can't help it.. i may be weird but it's not my fault that i'm weird.. when i'm really pissed at someone, i'm very hard-headed.. i can go on ignoring that person till goodness knows when... so better not piss me off... haha
i guess i'm done complaining.. sorry to whoever who has to read through this... i'm just very pissed.. and if i dun vomit it all out, i'll burst and migh have a breakdown... ahaha